How Can I Comfort Someone Suffering?

Do you ever feel like you don’t know what to say or do when someone you love is hurting?  Have you found yourself speechless for fear of saying the wrong thing?  I’ve been there.  It’s an anxious feeling that keeps you second-guessing whether you have anything to offer.

Knowing the right words to say may seem out of reach, but it’s not.   Whenever I begin to feel inadequate or ill-equipped, the Lord brings to mind what is true:  “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness,” 2 Peter 1:3 .    It’s a verse that pulls me back to what’s right and true.  Summed up, I have everything I need to live as God would want.  I’m not lacking in anything, because it’s Christ who lives in me.  He makes me qualified to provide comfort to those in pain.  Galatians 2:20

A Blessing of Comfort

So how can we be instruments of comfort to those hurting?  In Susan Hunt’s book, Spiritual Mothering, she gives us a glimpse into real-life stories of women helping women–life on life discipleship that points to Christ as Savior, King and Comforter.  And if you’re like me, I learn best when someone shows me how to do this practically.  That’s why I loved seeing the application of this in her book.  Listen to what women shared when asked to finish the following sentence:

I was comforted when…

• A friend sent me a card each month for a year following my husband’s death.
• An older woman at church told me that she would pray daily for my unbelieving husband and that she was proud of me for bringing the children to church.
• The women in my church took turns staying with me after I was raped.  They read Scripture to me, prayed with me, and never left me alone until I felt I was ready.  Over and over they told me that I was not to blame until finally I began to believe it.
• A friend remembered that Mother’s Day was difficult for me, because I desperately wanted to be a mother.  She simply hugged me and said, “I love you.”

There is power in being present when someone is hurting.  Even if we don’t know what to do, we can begin with a simple, “I care for you, and I’m here for you.”

On some of my darkest days, it has been the women who have simply held my hand, hugged me and reassured me that I was not alone.  One particular woman often called or text me weekly when my oldest daughter walked away from the Lord.  She always reminded me that she was there for me.  God knew I needed that.  My mom’s heart was breaking and I was an emotional mess.  Yet having a loving hand to hold in that season was a comfort and physical reminder that God was with me.

So, let’s not shy away from the ministry of comfort. It’s to this we are equipped and called to.  Embrace it!  Let’s press in and love each other deeply, bearing one another’s burdens-this is what loving as Christ looks like.  Galatians 6:2

Who in your life is suffering and in need of comfort?